Today I broke down

I think today it finally hit me that my grandpa is gone and never coming back. I don’t know why today of all days is when it hit me but I was on the verge of tears all day and after my last class I just cried and cried. What hurts me the most is that he’s supposed to be here. Yes, he was sick, but I thought he was getting better. This was the hardest loss I’ve ever gone through, because my grandpa was supposed to live forever. I at least thought he’d get to see my graduate college and maybe get married. I wish I could have one more chance to see you and hug you and tell you how much I love you. Thank you for giving me the best years of my life, I’ll cherish them forever <3

A few days ago, I lost my grandpa to stage 4 lung cancer. He was the greatest man I&#8217;ve ever known. And I know a lot of people say this about anyone who died, but my grandpa was a huge part of my life. I&#8217;m trying to imagine life without him, and I can&#8217;t. Our family parties will never be the same. My grandpa touched so many people&#8217;s lives, that I know more than just my family are hurting right now. My grandpa was not a man of many words, and his way of showing he cared was not what people would call normal. If you got a sarcastic comment thrown at you, you knew he loved you. Although his time on earth was cut way too short, I know he&#8217;ll never fully be gone. I know he&#8217;ll be watching over me and my family wherever we go, alongside my grandma. RIP, no words could ever describe how much I&#8217;m going to miss you. I love you always, your Angel Big Girl.

A few days ago, I lost my grandpa to stage 4 lung cancer. He was the greatest man I’ve ever known. And I know a lot of people say this about anyone who died, but my grandpa was a huge part of my life. I’m trying to imagine life without him, and I can’t. Our family parties will never be the same. My grandpa touched so many people’s lives, that I know more than just my family are hurting right now. My grandpa was not a man of many words, and his way of showing he cared was not what people would call normal. If you got a sarcastic comment thrown at you, you knew he loved you. Although his time on earth was cut way too short, I know he’ll never fully be gone. I know he’ll be watching over me and my family wherever we go, alongside my grandma. RIP, no words could ever describe how much I’m going to miss you. I love you always, your Angel Big Girl.

Thinking about life after graduation scares the shit out of me.

It seems like every day someone asks me what my plans are for after graduation. Is “I don’t know” an acceptable answer? Because that’s all I can say. I’m having the hardest time accepting that I’m a senior and that I’m graduating in 8 months. I’m not ready to leave the place I’ve called home for the past 4 years or the amazing people I’ve met along the way.